The Word - Vol 81

Glen’s Goodbye

I said goodbye to an old friend recently. It was the final goodbye, something that is happening way too often these days as the clock keeps ticking in our lives. Maybe you’re going through the same experience? It’s what seems to be happening in our stage of life. To paraphrase a song, “When did we get old? Did time speed up, or did we slow down?”

​As is too often the case these days, cancer took my friend. He tried as many ways as possible to beat the insidious disease. He was never given very good odds to beat it, but he tried, and tried so very hard. His name was Glen Hunter.

Glen and I are the same age, 75. I know that’s just a number, but it’s one both of us never paid too much attention to, until these last few years. Sure, our birth certificate said we were 75, but when we got up in the morning and looked in the mirror we were both looking at 45 year olds, some days maybe 35! We would often talk about something I had heard once from an Indigenous Elder years ago. He never talked about how old he was, or how many years he might have left, he measured time in summers. “How many summers have you seen and how many of those were really good ones?” And, “how many summers do you think you have left. Nobody really knows, so you better make the most of them because there could be fewer than you think.” Glen was the kind of guy who was making the most of those summers he had left.

When the end was getting near, Glen and his wife Pat sought help from, and extend their sincere gratitude to, the Surrey Cancer Agency, the White Rock community palliative care team, and the wonderful staff at Melville Hospice in White Rock. We’re so fortunate to have these caring supportive services in our community to lend such valuable and needed support.

I paid my last visit to Glen the day he passed from this earth. The Hospice staff had made sure he was resting comfortably. Following Glen’s passing, Glen’s wife Pat asked if I would MC his Celebration of Life. I was honoured. I guess my only concern was, would I be able to hold it together through the ceremony. Every time I felt a lump in my throat start to grow, I tried to think of anyone except Glen.

It was a wonderful send off. Glen was a Vancouver Firefighter who came up through the ranks and retired as a Battalion Chief. As is the custom, an Honour Guard from the VFD opened and closed the ceremony. An honourable tribute to one of their own. His daughters, Alison and Courtney shared lovely memories of their father, and two of the grandchildren, Connor and Chase gave us a marvellous insight as to who their Papa was, and how he impacted their lives. Rod McNeil, an old friend from high school days took us back to his early years, and retired Deputy Chief of the Vancouver Fire and Rescue Fred Bird reflected on the early days with the department. A video of photos from the past capped off the Celebration of Life.

It’s been said that we are the sum of our stories, and we live on in memories only as long as those stories are told. That’s why people have celebrations of life and gather to remember the person that was, passing on stories from one to another. We did just that. It was a wonderful collection of stories that were told that day and passed around the room. Some were old stories re-told, and for some they were brand new stories which made it a heart warming afternoon. All these tales are so important to help keep alive the memory of someone very special. Glen would have loved it.

Singer, songwriter, musician John York performed at Blue Frog Studios recently and he sang a song that he wrote, a song that speaks to losing a friend, losing a colleague, losing a loved one. The song is called “When Goodbye was really Goodbye.” The first lines of the song go like this. “The very last time that we said goodbye, I wished I had looked you in the eye. How was I to know it was your time to go, and goodbye was really goodbye.”

Never pass up that chance to spread a little love, for goodbye could really be goodbye.

Till next week...
Wayne

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